You may think I’m just a dog
but I’m so much more than that
don’t you know how I protect you
from getting eaten by the cat?
You hear that cat is purring,
you think it loves you so–
but there is something in that cat’s mind
you probably should know.
That cat, it wants to eat you.
it’s waiting for you to die.
when you sleep, it takes your pulse,
then heaves a heavy sigh
It’s you the cat wants to devour,
in a boiling giant stew
I’ve seen the recipe book – it’s called
“The Joy of Eating You.”
So when I’m barking at the cat
And you yell at me – remember –
It’s not me who wants your flesh-
to butcher and dismember
It’s that cat! I’ve seen it’s face
It’s planning out your plating.
Lucky you that Squishy’s here
that cat’s getting tired of waiting.